Guns in Movie Posters

28/09/2011 in Action, Alexis King, Commentary

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One of the greatest unsung stars in the movies, overlooked at awards time, but our favorite heroes’ best supporting act when the heat is on, ladies and gentleman please put your hands together, then up, for… the gun.

The best action movies pop with Glocks, fantasy adventures fizz with .45s, could a thriller unfold without seeing a barrel revolve and who isn’t best in the west without a Winchester? So its hard not to reminisce of our all time favorite firearm scenes, you know, the ones where we had so much gun…

Movie Poster Guns 1

You will be acquainted by now with Jules Winnfield’s associate Mr. Nine Millimeter. Michael Corleone did come out of that toilet with more than his dick in his hand. It is this writer’s duty to inform the reader that Private Pyle has a full magazine, and that it is locked and loaded. You did say hello to his little friend didn’t you? A bullwhip just isn’t the weapon of choice when faced with an expert scimitar. Oh, whoops Hans…no fuckin’ bullets…

Our most testosterone fueled lone guns are synonymous with a particular steel all their own.

A Magnum .44, the most powerful hand gun in the world is not standard issue for the San Francisco Police Department. A license to kill on behalf of Her Majesty’s Secret Service is preferably undertaken by Walther PPK. 12 Gauge auto-loader, .45 Longslide with Laser sighting, Uzi 9mm; any one of these is ideal for home defence. So which’ll it be?

Movie Poster Guns 2

So maybe you just ain’t all that ‘trigger happy’, guns are frightening for you or you don’t ever want to get your hands dirty. No problem, you can hire a person who will.

Just put up a little collateral and you can get Vincent to work a night shift. Want a man who never misses? We got just the guy, well, Sorter… Even if you don’t have a lot of money for the job, there is this one Italian guy who will work for a glass of milk, and he’s totally professional.

If you want to get paid and have less scruples, the government is always on the look out for someone to fire their guns.

They might send you overseas and give you a spot in a CH-34 Choctaw, where you can show the local people how to get some. But that’s a luxury, more likely someone is going to be shooting back at you as you and your buddies try to make it out of a boat and onto a beach, across a few blocks of Mogadishu, or over a bridge. Is that one too far?

On occasion they won’t want it known that you work for them, to them you are just an expendable, an asset, so they may drop you into a meat grinder to do their dirty work, where you might find yourself capping off 200 rounds and then a mini-gun, full pack, and hit nothing. Which would be great if the game happens to be Russian roulette.

Movie Poster Guns 3

Perhaps you prefer to stay at home for your money.

Sure, no problem after your training day you’ll be a street king, one of the ‘G’ men, an untouchable in no time. You’ll have a chance to swat every lucky punk who dares to show his colors, and should you ever have to bring the heat and face off against any public enemies, dead and ex-presidents or other low life residents of L.A. it’ll all be kept confidential.

Now, there will be the usual suspects reading this who feel a true romance, lock stock, for the other side of the gun game.

These are the Bonnie & Clyde types who probably listen to K-Billy’s “Super Sounds of the Seventies” on a weekend, the boyz ‘n’ the hood little caesars with their scarred faces, who like nothing more than to spend a long good Friday, from dusk til dawn in Chinatown. Who would consider them more than a menace to society?

Movie Poster Guns 3

As we pull back the hammer so we roll back the years, back to a time and a place where it’s every man’s sovereign right to bear arms, no matter if that man was good, bad or ugly and you’re a daisy if you do.

A time where there were law breakers and peacemakers and a place where some men rain dance, some dance with wolves or you might watch the sun dance. That’s right, a real wild bunch. A world where should the legend become fact, they print the legend, so if you are a shootist, consider yourself unforgiven then fill your hand you son of a bitch!

There have, of course, been times when the barrel of the gun is the straight man to the barrel of fun.

Would Rupert Pupkin have been the ‘King of Comedy’ without a big hand? Would Sean have seen the dead off without blowing their heads off? Where would the other guys be without that… OK that one was a… wooden… gun. Let’s just say that if you mark that frame an eight, you’re entering a world of pain. Tackleberry!!!!

So if there is any lingering doubt that the gun has become a star, a leading light, a shooter to be shot just check out a movie poster coming soon to a billboard near you…

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